Why You Don’t Want to Break Free from the Dream State

Breaking free from the dream state is a huge undertaking. Or, maybe not? I’ve found it to be the simplest, yet most complex thing there is to do. Because of this simple-complex paradox issue, I thought this post could be the start of a series. I want to start the series by explaining why you likely don’t want to break free even though there are ample reasons to break free.

If you can grasp this and run with it, your life will be exponentially more lived. You’ll feel at ease more often. You’ll think for yourself. You’ll live for yourself. You won’t care what people think. You won’t need morals, laws, rituals or beliefs. You’ll be free from cultural restraints. You’ll have a clearer view of everyone and everything. You’ll learn how to love without trying to love.

Sounds good, right? Why would you want to do anything else but break free?! (And if you’re lost on what I mean by “breaking free” right now that’s okay. This Alan Watts video might help.)

Well, we’ll get to that. First, how do you break free from the dream state, or, otherwise known as, the cultural matrix? Simple! Here are three ways to answer:

  • Wonder about everything with pure intent on finding truth.

  • Get rid of what is not true.

  • Stop personalizing.

Done. Not complex at all!

Buuuuut, welllllll….

It sounds simple but if it were truly simple, why is no one doing it? Why does it seem like no one wants to find out? Why is everyone avoiding it like the plague? Well, I have some ideas. I listed several “maybe’s” below, or, several reasons breaking free, perhaps, isn’t on your radar.

  • Maybe you’re too comfortable with how things are. Why would you want to break free from this culture when you think you have it pretty good? Ex:

    • You may have some cultural power. When one has cultural power, one can easily isolate oneself from seeing suffering and ones part in it.

    • You may compare yourself to others and think, “Well, at least I don’t have that problem” or “I have it pretty good compared to ______.”

    • You may not know any better. You just don’t know there is another way.

  • Maybe it’s because you were raised to conform and you weren’t taught how to think for yourself. How would you know how to break free when everything you were told since you were an infant was:

    • “Listen, do what I say, and follow the rules.” (don’t think)

    • Action A = Good. Action B = Bad. (conform to someone else’s definitions)

    • “Stop asking questions, stop being curious, stop wondering.” (don’t look for truth)

    • “Don’t listen to how you feel, just be productive.” (more money more power more… happiness??)

  • Maybe it’s because you were taught to feel worthless and not good enough, therefore, your life’s journey is proving you’re something. Most of us were given subliminal messaging since we were born. Why would you even think to break free when everything you were told since you were a baby was:

    • “Be more like ________.” (you’re not enough)

    • “Work harder and do more and win.” (you’re not okay)

    • “Debate instead of dialogue.” (knowledge will make you better than other, hierarchy is the only way)

  • Maybe you’re attached to your drama, a.k.a. anxiety, depression, fun, anger, unhappiness, happiness, dysfunction, fear. Perhaps the excitement of the roller coaster fools you. You don’t know what it would feel like to step off of it, so you just keep going.

  • Maybe it’s because you’re scared of, well, everything! But not scared enough to break. So, you just stay on the roller coaster. Fear reigns in most of us.

  • Maybe it’s because you’re distracted. You continue to believe the lies your culture throws at you because shiny, short term pleasures seem right in a fast-paced environment. Why would you look at reality when you can watch Netflix instead? Or go out with friends? Save puppies? Plan a vacation?

  • Maybe it’s because your navigational system is the trickster of all tricksters. The system put in to place to help you navigate the world around you has become clouded by the “I”- the illusion of self. Your obsession with yourself is battling truth all the time. You move through life constantly forgetting the universe is not centered around you.

  • Maybe it’s because your culture told you spirituality is blissful, peaceful, looks like Buddha, and is something “cool” to do. That’s bull. The spirituality industry makes billions of dollars annually by feeding you lies. Spirituality is so simple, but painful. No one wants to talk about the unpleasant, painful things, but we have to to get to truth. It’s painful because you have to look at your falseness, and that damn “I” wants to hold on tight. The spirituality industry that’s feeding your “I” keeps telling you to listen to all those podcasts and people who “know more than you”, instead of listening to yourself and doing the strenuous work of observing your fakeness. Just look at it. It’s there.

  • Maybe it’s because you’ve been told being enlightened is “out there” and you should worship the very special people who have obtained this “woke” thing. Bull. Maybe one person you follow is awake, but I’d bet money they aren’t. Now that I know what to look for, I can tell you very, very few are. But, importantly, it’s not some miracle from above and impossible, it’s right here, in you. You just have to let go of your desire to know what awake means, and just start questioning everything.

I could keep on but you’re probably going to get bored at some point soon. Basically, we all keep settling into these make-believed beliefs our culture, therefore our thoughts, offers up as reality. It is a dream state. That’s all it is. They are beliefs that we’ve left unquestioned.

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You may not want to believe I know what I’m talking about. I’m definitely not awake/enlightened, etc., and I’m not famous. So why would you?! You may think you’ve questioned enough; you’re somewhere, and you’re good. And truthfully, you are good. We are all good with where we are because that’s where we’re suppose to be because that’s where we are (paradox alert). Aaaaand… if you’re curious…here are two examples to inspire you to keep going, keep exploring, don’t give up!

Example 1 of how tricky the dream state illusion is:

Imagine… You are against child labor. You are part of your areas anti-racism coalition. You are a social worker. You are kind. You are a hard worker. You are doing “good” things.

Great. But that’s about you. This is where true honesty and vulnerability come in, and the work can start. It’s very uncomfortable to really look at our beliefs around our good qualities or parts of our personality we like. We all want to say “No, saving puppies really is about the puppies! It’s so important!!”. No one wants to hear, “Actually, you want to save the puppies because our culture makes you feel like you’re not worthy enough, so you need to feel helpful and ‘good’ so your ego feels relief and you can go on not actually looking at what’s true”. I’m not saying you don’t love puppies and children and you don’t want what’s best for everybody. But your attachment to “wanting what’s best for everybody” is the problem. How do you know who and what you are, if you can’t question those parts of you? You can’t get out of your own way. The “I” is speaking for you, instead of truth. You are thinking within the dream state.

Example 2 of how tricky the dream state illusion is:

To get out of the dream state you have to become nobody in a culture that significantly values you becoming somebody. You have to drop all illusions that you are “more than”, and you have to realize hierarchy is a toxic cultural framework that isn’t reality. Instead of gaining knowledge you have to let go of the idea that knowledge will get you anywhere, hence, the paradox of breaking free being the simplest, yet most complex thing there is to do.

It’s so simple!: Slow down. Observe. Let go.

Complex!: Battle everything culture tells you. Battle everyone you know and all your beliefs.

My suggestion if you want to stop dreaming: Be quiet more often. Observe your thoughts and actions in an impersonal way. Observe your feelings and sensations. Observe everything around you. Ride the rollercoaster of thinking you know something, then being smacked down and humbled by realizing you know very little. Don’t give up! We got this.

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